Forbidden Emotions
by Hoshi-san
Summary: This is my first fic. *fells proud* It takes place in Crystal Tokyo time, where laughter and peace fills the air. The young Queen and King rule wisely and their daughter is a beautiful young little girl. But thoughts trouble our dear Queen. Read to find o
1. A Silent Prayer

Forbidden Emotions :: Prologue 

  
  
Hello there, people.   
I'm here to let all the fabulous people out there to read my story. ::smile::   
First off, I wanna thank Pluto-san for her incredible support. Love ya girl. ::throws pillow::   
Be warned that this story is about the (in)existent love between Usagi (Serena) and Seiya. I'm basing this in the anime and I will be using the Japanese names.   
It takes place in Crystal Tokyo, so Usagi and Mamoru are already married and Chibiusa is already a 8-12 year old (still have to figure that out).   
Have fun with the story.   
Disclaimer : I do not own Sailor Moon nor any of it's characters, although I wish I did. They come from the brilliant mind of Takaeuchi Naoko-san and also belong to some other companies.   
  
**Forbidden Emotions**   
  
Prologue:: A Silent Prayer   
  
Everything is dark. Nothing can be seen. Only a voice is heard. One that echoes trough the place.   
::drop::   
"Silence..."   
::drop::   
"Confusion..."   
::drop::   
"Emptiness..."   
::drop::   
"Loneliness..."   
::drop::   
"This is everything I can feel since he left..."   
::drop::   
"No more laughter..."   
::drop::   
"No more fun..."   
::drop::   
"No more happiness..."   
::drop::   
"No more love..."   
::drop::   
We can see now a human figure floating above the water. A girl. Her long hair is loose and blows in the invisible wind. It almost touches the water.   
::drop::   
A close up of the girl. We can not see it's features because the only light existent in the place emanates from her. She's completely nude. The only thing covering her is her hair.   
::drop::   
Another tear rolls down her cheek and touches the water. More circular waves beneath her.   
::drop::   
"I fell so lonely, but I'm not..."   
::drop::   
"I have friends, real friends..."   
::drop::   
"I'm even married, but... "   
::drop::   
She cries harder, all the tears mingling together in the water. She joins her hands, near her breasts, and closes her eyes. It looks like she was praying.   
::drop::   
"But he's not the one to hold my heart..."   
::drop::   
The moon appears in the background. It's light shines upon her.   
::drop::   
"You are..."   
::drop::   
She opens her eyes to reveal it's beauty. They have the most beautiful blue color, that makes you drown inside those pools. A shooting star passes by the moon.   
::drop::   
"Come back to me..."   
::drop::   
On her forehead, a brilliant light shines with all it's might. It's the symbol of the moon family.   
::drop::   
The moonlight intensifies and reveals her identity. She's Serenity, Queen of both the Moon and the Earth.   
::drop::   
"Seiya-chan..."   
The scene fades to black...   
  
+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+   
  
This is the end of my prologue. A little wierd, hum!?   
Oh well...at least it was my idea. ::smile::   
Anyways...If you want to know what happens next, don't miss the next chapter. More things will be revealed, as well as other characters, old and new (I think). I still don't know if there will be fights in this fanfic, but probably not. I think I'm just going to stick with the mushy stuff. ::grin::   
Gotta go now. The chapter was really small, but I'm tired today.   
And in case you didn't notice, +drop+ symbolises the fallen tears. I believe it's pretty obvious... ::sweatdrop:: Ok, maybe not in the beginning, but bare with me. This is my first fanfic.   
Ja ne, minna!!   
  
Kawaii Hoshi a.k.a. Joana *Kou* (I wish ::sight:: but he can't take his eyes of his 'odango'. Damn.).   
[E-mail ][1] me. 

   [1]: mailto:seera_uingu@yahoo.com



	2. There You'll Be

Forbidden Emotions :: Chapter One 

  
  
Hello (again), minna-san!!   
I'm back and better than ever. ::everyone sweatdrops::   
This time I'll use some Japanese words and I'll put their English meaning, in case you don't know.   
For those who still haven't read the prologue, I advise you to do it if you wanna read the rest. You're going to 'need' it for future chapters. And in case you didn't knew, this is an Usagi-Seiya fic, so no flames...it is my idea and my opinion when I say that they're the best couple in the anime. In the manga, Mamoru is the best.   
I could go on endlessly telling you how wonderful Seiya is. ::sight:: ::gets the 'go-on-with-it-or-I'll-kill-you' look from the rest of the people:: ::gulps:: hehe...::sweatdrop:: or I could start with the fic.   
By the way, if you have Faith Hill's single 'There you'll be', I honestly advise you to put it in your CD player and start it when Usagi turns the music on (you'll see below). Just an advice. Now it's safe to read.   
  
**Forbidden Emotions**   
  
Chapter One:: There You'll Be   
  
We can see a young girl laying on a bed sleeping. Her golden hair is messed and covers up most of her face. Still, we can see her delicate features beneath her long silky hair. Her eyes delicately shut, her cherry lips partially open, her breathing heavy and regular. She looks like a sleeping angel...Kirei.*   
Outside the sky is blue and the sun already rose. But you can still look up and see the outline of the moon. It's almost full, but not quite. The sun decides to enter the bedroom, setting it's light over her eyes, making her stir in her sleep. She still doesn't wake up, but turns to the other side. The hair is falling over her eyes and the rest of her body. She's sleeping in a soft pink sleep gawn, down to her feet. She is only covered by that and the somewhat looking transparent jacket, also pink in color. The sun may haven't woke her up, but the sudden laughter that erupted outside did, even if the voices were somewhat faint.   
_"Come on. You can do better than that, Oh mighty senshi*. Don't tell me you cannot catch me."   
"Iie*. I could..." ::pause:: "...but I'm too tired right now."   
"You're just saying that 'cause you're a slow poke."   
"I'm not. I can ran faster than you." ::pause:: "Eh..matte*. Chibiusa-chan, wait for me."   
::giggles:: "You can't catch me. Hotaru-chan can't catch me."   
::more laughter::_   
She opened up her eyes.::groan::   
::trough clenched teeth:: "Why cant' they keep it quiet?" ::sight:: "Might as well get up now. No way I'm going to sleep trough this commotion."   
She got up and seated on her bed, rubbing her eyes. She then stretched her arms and gave a little yawn, smiling when she finished.   
"If someone saw me now, they would say 'That is not proper off a Queen'...What can I do?" ::shrugs:: "I was never the morning type."   
She got up from the bed and went to her CD Player (Hey, she _is_ a Queen from the 30th Century). She plopped a CD there, the one with the recording of her own song.   
"I never now what possessed me to record this." ::blush::   
She slid her finger trough the buttons pressing the 'open/close' one and then 'play'. It's melody started echoing trough the room.   
  
(Beginning from Faith Hill's single - 'There You'll Be')   
  
Humming to the song, she picked up a brush and started combing her loose hair, not before passing a finger trough her royal mark, the mark from the Moon Kingdom Royalty.   
  
_When I think back on these times   
And the dreams we left behind   
I'll be glad 'cause I was blessed   
To get to have you in my life_   
  
At the same time as her voice echoed trough the room trough the speakers, she combed her hair thinking about the times that they had shared. She was so naive back then. But even if she had wanted, she had a destiny to fulfill. She couldn't leave her friends, her family, her protectors down. She couldn't leave Mamoru-san down...and not especially Chibiusa. She had loved her daughter even before she was born.   
  
_When I look back on these days   
I'll look and see your face   
You were right there for me_   
  
She could see his face. He was so kawaii* when he smiled, witch happened most of the time, and just plainly sweet. He was the only of the Starlights that believed in her.   
  
_In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the sky   
In my heart there'll always be a place for you, for all my life   
I'll keep a part of you with me   
And everywhere I am there you'll be   
And everywhere I am there you'll be_   
  
The others learned to trust her and her friends as well, but he was the only that never left her side. Not even now...light years away from Earth. His heart was hers...and hers was his. Their hearts will always be together. She hasn't seen him for a _long_ time (put long in it), but he was still very much fresh in her memory. His smile, his eyes, his mocking. ::giggles:: His lips... ::blush::   
::whisper:: "Seiya-chan..."   
  
_Well, you showed me how it feels   
To feel the sky within my reach   
And I always will remember all the strength you gave to me   
Your love made me make it through   
Oh, I owe so much to you   
You were right there for me_   
  
Yes, it's true. He was always there for her. Always by her side, supporting her, giving her strength, telling her to believe...Even if it hurt him 'cause he loved her, but she was in love with somebody else...Mamo-chan. No...Mamoru-san. No more Mamo-chan...it was Mamoru-san now. But no one noticed the change as he was addressed as Endymion now. Or so they made that way. She wasn't naive anymore. She knew her friends noticed her change since the Starlights left, all of her friends, and Mamoru-san too.   
  
_In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the sky   
In my heart there'll always be a place for you, for all my life   
I'll keep a part of you with me   
And everywhere I am there you'll be_   
  
She missed him. She really did. She started to remember when they met, how she didn't like him by them and how she eventually fell for him. Only Chibiusa didn't knew any of this, and Hotaru-chan couldn't remember much, but she knew. Chibiusa...the only happiness she had left, together with Seiya-chan. They were her priorities, her light, her strength, her life...she would surely die without any of them.   
  
_Cause I always saw in you my light, my strength   
And I want to thank you now for all the ways_   
  
She got up and walked to the balcony of the room, opening the curtains and smelling the air, singing the lyrics at the same time as the recording. At the same time in other place, far away from there, a girl looked up at the sky.   
  
"You were right there for me   
You were right there for me..."   
  
The air played with her air as she listened 'Always' being screamed in the background. Sakura* petals danced with her golden hair around her, and she looked up at the sky. Both souls were touched at that time.   
  
"In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the sky   
In my heart there'll always be a place for you, for all my life..."   
  
Chibiusa and Hotaru looked up at the balcony at the singing Queen. She was pouring her heart out.   
::whisper:: "Kouhi*..."   
::whisper:: "Okaasan*..."   
  
"I'll keep a part of you with me   
And everywhere I am there you'll be   
And everywhere I am there you'll be..."   
  
With her tearful eyes, she looked up at the moon, whispering 'There you'll be'.   
  
------------------------------------------------------------   
Japanese Translations:   
  
*kirei - beautiful   
*senshi - soldier   
*Iie - No   
*matte - stop, wait   
*kawaii - adorable, cute, sweet...   
*sakura - cherry blossom (my favorite flower, along with red roses ::smile::)   
*Kouhi - Queen   
*okaasan (I think it's like this, if not tell me) - mother   
  
Endings for names:   
  
...-chan -- ending for female names, for friends really close to you, like Hotaru calling Chibiusa-chan and her calling her Hotaru-chan. Can also be for boyfriends, like she used to call Mamoru, Mamo-chan, and now Seiya is Seiya-chan (not because he's a girl as Fighter), kind of like a pet name.   
...-san -- used in the end of the names of those you admire of have respect for. She calls her husband Mamoru-san.   
no ending -- lovers or really close people. She calls her daughter only Chibiusa. Can also be a cold way of addressing people you hate or dislike.   
  
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+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+   
  
::hops around and screams:: Yes! Yes! This is the end of chapter one. More a song fic than other thing. I really had to do this part. ::smile:: If you want the mp3, just e-mail me.   
Now I just need a song from Seiya's point of view...maybe Richard Mark's song 'Right Here Waiting'. I dunno. Just give me ideas, ok?? ::puppy dog eyes:: Arigatou. I really hope you're liking this fic so far.   
Oh, and I do not own Sailormoon nor any of it's characters, Naoko-san does, as well as other companies, I'm just using them in my fic (yes, _IT_IS_ mine) twisting their story ::laugh:: I also do not own the song. It was written by Diane Warren (she has some pretty neat songs) and performed by Faith Hill (in this fic, by a Tsukino Usagi with a wonderful voice, not childish, ok?). Now that that's understood...Ja ne!!   
::sight:: I'm tired....   
Did I already said how much I love feedback?? ::hint hint:: ::wink wink::   
You can send it to [ Kawaii Hoshi][1].   
  
*~*Kawaii Hoshi*~*   
"If all my friends were to jump off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them. I would be at the bottom to catch them." 

   [1]: mailto:seera_uingu@yahoo.com



	3. Shattered Hopes

Forbidden Emotions :: Chapter Two 

  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon nor any of it's characters, although I wish I did. They come from the brilliant mind of Naoko-san and also belong to some other companies.   
I leave you now with the twists of my story.   
And thank you very much to Pluto-san that has been following this fic since the beginning.   
I already said how much I love feedback, right? So I'll hear from you, won't I?? ::puppy dog eyes::   
Just a warning: a bit of yuri up ahead. Now that's said...On with the show.   
  
**Forbidden Emotions**   
  
Chapter Two :: Shattered Hopes   
  
------ In a galaxy light years away from Earth ------   
  
A girl is looking up at the sky in amazement. She couldn't believe what just happened.   
::whisper:: "Impossible..."   
"What is??"   
She looked startled and looked behind her...   
::whisper:: "Kouhi*...I..."   
Her Queen fingers touched her lips, silencing her.   
::soft voice:: "It's her, isn't it?"   
The girl just nodded. Her fingers moved from the girl's lips to her cheek, making her blush.   
::soft voice:: "What happened this time?"   
"I felt...I fe-fe-lt he-r-r so-ul to-to-uch mi-ne..." She stammered, looking down, finding her feet somehow fascinating. The Queen looked startled, got up and left the room, but not without looking behind her.   
::whisper:: "Maybe it did..."   
She left, leaving the girl gazing up at the sky again.   
  
------ Back on Earth ------   
  
A very oblivious Usagi is looking up at the sky.   
"Okaasan*...Daijoubu*?"   
She looks at the garden below her balcony, seeing her daughter concerned about her.   
::small smile:: "Hai*. Don't worry, sweetie. I'm fine."   
She smiles back at her mother.   
"Ok. I'm gonna play with Hotaru-chan. Wanna come?"   
::laugh:: "I would love to. Just let me take a shower and eat something first, ok? I'll be down in a sec."   
::smile:: "Hai, Okaasan*. I'll wait." ::turns to Hotaru:: "You still haven't caught me."   
"Yes I have..."   
"No you haven't..." ::starts running::   
::follows her:: "Yes I have..."   
She laughs at both of them. She looks up at the sky one more time before re-entering her room.   
  
+++++++++++++++++++   
  
Two female figures are walking down the streets of Crystal Tokyo. The taller one looks down at her companion.   
"Do you think she will be happy to see us?"   
The small one looks up and smiles.   
"Of course she will. She hasn't seen us for a long time."   
"It was her that told us that we should take some time for ourselves."   
::seductive smile:: "And did you like spending that time..." ::at the same time as she runs her finger trough the other girl's chest:: "...with me..." ::moves closer to her ear:: "...alone?"   
::puts her arm around the small girl and smiles back:: "You bet I was."   
  
+++++++++++++++++++   
  
"What am I going to wear?" ::sight:: "No important stuff to do today..."   
Usagi was looking trough all her stuff, but she had no idea what to choose. She just knew it had to be simple, like she liked. She then spotted a long pink dress (what's new? ::smile) that she had bought on one of her weekly escapes from the palace. Nobody knew, but once a week, minimum, she would leave the palace grounds as Tsukino Usagi and wonder around on her own. She missed her life as Tsukino Usagi...the normal somewhat klutz, cry-baby, lazy childish girl. She would hang around with her friends not caring about anything. Then came the battles, then peace, then battles...but she would still manage to have fun. Now...now she must live inside this 'prison-like' palace and wonder trough the gardens. Yuppie...that's great...not.   
::sight:: "I even miss pigging around..." ::laugh:: "But now..." ::gloomy face::   
It was gone. Both her freedom and her happiness. All gone...just like that.   
Leaning against the door was a human figure looking inside at the sad girl. A male figure.   
::whisper:: "Usako..."   
It pained him...it pained him to see her so sad and knowing the reason to it. It was him. He was the reason that the love of his life was going trough so much pain. If it wasn't for him and the past that _used_ to unite them, none of this would have happened, and she would be happy. It pained him to see her like this.   
"Seiya-chan..."   
His heart must have fallen right there. The crystal like pieces were lying on the floor and no one could pick them up. Nor now nor never. It was over...it was all over now. He knew it for a long time, but only when that word...when that little word escaped her lips, he accepted the inevitable. She didn't love him. Maybe she never really did in this life. Yes...in the past Serenity loved Endymion, but in this life Tsukino Usagi didn't love Chiba Mamoru...she loved Seiya Kou. He closed his hand in a fist and made a swing for the wall, stopping just inches away from it. He knew what he had to do. It would pain him, but his heart was already broken into a million pieces anyway. He turned around and left. He didn't notice the girl that was gazing at his retreating back. He didn't notice when she moved from her closet to her door. He didn't even notice when one of her tears joined his broken heart on the floor. He didn't notice...he didn't care.   
  
+++++++++++++++++++   
  
"Michiru-mamma. Haruka-pappa. You're back."   
Hotaru made a mad dash towards the two puzzled girls, that smiled when felt her little arms around them.   
"Calm down, Hotaru-chan. We were only gone for two weeks." Haruka said while kneeling in front of the little girl, smiling.   
::throws arms around Haruka:: "I know...but it looked like two years to me..." ::Haruka's smile widens:: "And so much happened lately..."   
::frown:: "What did?"   
Michiru rested a hand on her lover's shoulder, pointing ahead. As Haruka looked on, she saw a very pissed Mamoru coming from inside the palace at full speed, steam coming up from his boiling anger (oops).   
::whisper:: "What happened?"   
::whisper:: "I don't know, Haruka-pappa..." ::pause:: "...But I think it has to do with the song."   
::Michiru kneels down, whispering:: "What song?"   
Mamoru walks right past them, not even noticing they were there in the first place. Both girls turn again to Hotaru, expectantly.   
"Okaasan's* song..."   
Haruka looks up at the other little girl like it grew an alien on her head (hehe...it would be funny tough). "Nani*?"   
"The one she wrote for the love of her life."   
"You mean your Otousan*?"   
"No, Michiru-san. Not him, but the one she loves."   
The other three looked at her, puzzled. Hotaru was the most amazed of them all. How could her friend know. No one told her anything. No one but...   
"Pluto-san!?"   
"No, Hotaru-chan. It wasn't Puu. It was Okaasan*." ::"nani's*?" and "why's?" were heard among the three:: "The way she acts towards Otousan* and the way she did in the past. Do not forget I traveled back and saw how their relationship worked. So I decided to check myself what happened that broke them apart and I understood. Okaasan* fell in love with an 'alien', as Haruka-san would put it." ::Haruka smiled at that comment:: "She is in love with another...That Starlight, Seiya Kou a.k.a. Sailor Star Fighter."   
::gets up abruptly:: "I'm going to kill him...I swear I'll kill him."   
::shakes head:: "But Haruka...He's light years away from here." ::everyone sweatdrops:: "Baka*..."   
::sight:: "But it's not his fault...sooner or later this would happen. It only proves that Okaasan* in this life does not feel the same towards Otousan* as she did in the past. It's not anyone's fault. No one can control the matters of the heart..." ::glances at Haruka and the Michiru:: "...and you should know that better than anyone." ::winks:: ::Haruka blushes and everyone laughs::   
"At least that lightened up the mood..." ::Michiru gets up:: "So...what do you think we could do?"   
"Well..." ::everyone looks at Chibiusa:: "I think I have an idea..."   
  
+++++++++++++++++++   
  
Mamoru reached a small 'house-look-alike', entering it without even knocking (I guess he forgot good manners. I mean...he _is_ pissed). He walked directly to a statue that had some kind of a goddess looks, all involved in what seemed wind. In it's hands laid an Orb. He touched it, making it lighten up, and in a blinding flash of light the hole room disappeared and in front of him was now standing a female figure with a Garnet Orb in her hands.   
"Pluto...I need your help."   
  
----------------------------------------------------------   
Japanese Translations:   
  
*Kouhi - Queen (easy)   
*Okaasan - Mother (duh..obvious)   
*Daijoubu - Are you allright?   
*Hai - Yes   
*Nani? - What?   
*Otousan - Father (Oh, the obvious ::grin::)   
*Baka - Idiot, stupid...among others   
  
Endings for names:   
  
...-chan -- ending for female names, for friends really close to you, like Hotaru calling Chibiusa-chan and her calling her Hotaru-chan. Can also be for boyfriends, like she used to call Mamoru, Mamo-chan, and now Seiya is Seiya-chan (not because he's a girl as Fighter), it's like a pet name.   
...-ko -- kind of like pet (sweet) name for females. Mamoru addresses his wife has Usako.   
...pappa ; ...-mamma -- sweet way that Hotaru calls the Outers, 'cause they are her parents (note that she calls Haruka-pappa and she is a girl ::grin::)   
...-san -- used in the end of the names of those you admire of have respect for. Chibiusa calls Haruka and Michiru using this ending.   
no ending -- lovers or really close people. Michiru and Haruka call themselves by their names. Can also be a cold way of addressing people you hate or dislike.   
Puu -- it's not an ending, but for those of you who don't know, Chibiusa calls Pluto like this 'cause they're really close.   
  
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+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+   
  
One more chapter is done.   
::streches arms::   
Yeah...My turn for a cliffhanger. Haha...   
::tries to sing "Sailor Star Song" at the top of her lungs::   
::everyone runs off::   
::blink blink::   
Hey...were did everyone go!?   
::blink blink::   
::sees cloud of smoke::   
Come back here...   
::runs after them::   
  
*~*Kawaii Hoshi*~*   
"Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say."   
  
PS - Comments, ideas, sugestions?? Just [e-mail][1] me. 

   [1]: mailto:seera_uingu@yahoo.com



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